Using the Industrial Dishwasher @ GS

Dishwasher instructions (Fagor Pass-Through Dishwasher)

Set up

1.     Insert the plug, filter tray, filter basket and metal dish rack guide

2.    Close the hood

3.   Hold the power button for 3 seconds

4.    The machine will fill with water and heat to 55°C (this takes approx. 5-10 mins)

5.   It is ready to use when the green light above P2 is solid

Running a cycle (aka actually washing dishes)

1.     Load the plastic dish rack

2.    Pull the hood down (P2 is the default wash cycle and will run automatically – cycle takes approx. 1 min).
P2 light flashing: wash in progress
P2 light solid: wash complete

Note: The P3 wash cycle can be used for very heavily soiled loads

Shut down

1.     Remove the metal dish rack guide, filter tray, filter basket and plug

2.    With the hood open, hold the P1 button for 3 seconds

3.   The machine will drain automatically and turn itself off

4.   Clean filter tray and filter basket in the sink

Small Group Toolbox - Ep 7 Genesis

Welcome to another episode of the Small Group Toolbox. And today we're starting a new series on the Bible, basically, because it's really common in small group ministry to like not be heaps confident about the Bible. We're in this role of leading studies, teaching the Bible, facilitating Bible discussions. And we often wonder like, do I know the Bible well enough? And yeah, should I really be here? But yeah, what can I do about that? So I think on the whole, most group leaders have a pretty good understanding of the Bible. But it always helps to learn a bit more. so this is part of what this podcast series is about. I'm hoping to do like a podcast on every book of the Bible. And just as we go through, give you a bit of a feel of what's going on in these different books and what it's like to read them and things you can learn and look out for.

Now, of course, there's a lot of great stuff out there on the Bible and understanding it better. So I would often recommend to people, God's Big Picture by Vaughan Roberts, a great little book. The new Bible commentary will tell you a lot about each book of the Bible. On the podcasting world, I love Nancy Guthrie's podcast, which is called Help Me Teach the Bible. And she pretty much has something on every book of the Bible with speaking to experts, Bible commentary writers and preachers and so on. So that's really good. But and also like the more college PTC courses, love those. A lot of great stuff out there on how to learn the Bible more. But I think it's good you know, just to hear from a regular pastor, maybe it's I'm a familiar voice to you. And so if you find this helpful, great, we'll look at a few different books of the Bible. But here we go, let's get into it.

So first one is Genesis. So we're just going to spend 10 minutes looking at Genesis in a way that's helpful for you in your own Bible reading and learning. And yeah, we'll see where we go. So Genesis, obviously, this is the first book of the Bible, Genesis just means the beginning. And it's really about a whole lot of beginnings. In my mind, I think Genesis kind of breaks up into three sections. You've got one to three, which is the creation, the creation of humanity in the fall, chapters one to three. Then you've got four to 11, which kind of about the spread of humanity leading up to the of Babel. Then you've got chapters 12 to 50, where we return again to a single family, Abraham and Sarah and their children, Isaac and Ishmael. Isaac gets married to Rebecca and on we go through Joseph. Three big sections and it's quite a lively book, easy to read, lots of action and things going on. People reading it or reading the Bible for the first time normally make good progress and get right into it. So let's have a look at those three sections, few big ideas, and then we'll draw a few conclusions at the end. So Genesis one to three, first big section, obviously starts with those famous words in verse one, in the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. And there we are from the word go, we just get big, big stuff. We've got God, this character appears. There's nothing about where he came from because, well, he's eternal. Nobody made God. He had just always was and is, and there he is here in verse one. And he's created the heavens and earth. He makes them. They didn't arise out of chaos or conflict or accidents or a mere radiation from God or anything like that.

It's a deliberate creation of the universe. And of course, there we read in Genesis 1 how God made the world in six days and the seventh day resting on that day. And the creation was good and beautifully made and there's loads we could look into there. In fact, you do find with Genesis, it's a book that people often go to, pastors often go to and preachers, when they're thinking about big ideas, major doctrines, foundational kind of things. So they will go back to Genesis and look at this is how our universe is made. This is the sort of things to take away from it. So Genesis one and two is great. And of course there we see humanity come in, made in God's image, given dominion over the earth, told to multiply. And we see there in Genesis two, kind of the first marriage between Adam and Eve. So a lot of foundational fundamental stuff there. In this first section, very quickly though, we get to the fall where the serpent tempts Adam and Eve into eating the fruit.

Rebelling against God and yes sin comes into the world and we have the fall they're excluded from the garden and death enters the world and everything like that. In these chapters there's a great little kind of gospel hint people sometimes talk about this as the proto gospel and that's in chapter 3 verse 15 which says where God speaks to the serpent and says I'll put enmity between you and the woman and between your offspring and hers he will crush your head and you will strike his heel. Interesting little note there, just a conflict between the serpent and the offspring of the woman.

He would crush the offspring, would crush the serpent's head. Just a hint there that God will overcome evil in this world through a human. Just a hint there of the gospel. But that's Genesis 1-3, really foundational, lots of stuff going on there. Preachers will often do very slow series looking at all sorts of themes through Genesis 1-3. So we get to Genesis 4-11, which is where we have Cain and Abel and Noah and the spread of humanity and what we see there is kind of basically the spread of sin as we get many people and humans multiply but sin is sort of ever-present in the Noah story God sort of starts afresh with Noah and his family but even then their offspring fall into sin and trouble like that we end up in Babel which is kind of a unified rebellion against God which God brings to an end through the introduction of languages and there's more conflict there. So 4-11 is like a spread of sin and a few other themes come in there as well, human technology, science, the arts in some ways, but it's against God.

That brings us then to the third section, which is from 12 to 50, a long narrative section where we go back to a single family. It's interesting. We started with a family in Genesis 1 to 3, Adam and Eve. We go worldwide scope in 4 to 11. We come back to a family in Genesis 12 to 50, Abraham and Sarah.

The key thing there really is from chapter 12, a very foundational promise that God makes to Abraham. Genesis 12 verse 1 says, Lord had said to Abraham, go from your country, your people and your father's household to the land I will show you. I will make you into a great nation and I will bless you. I will make your name great and you will be a blessing. I will bless those who bless you and whoever curses you, will curse and all the peoples on earth will be blessed through you.

All right, so that's a promise, but really foundational here for the big picture of the Bible. God is going to bless all peoples on earth. Like that blessing, it's a reversal of the curse thing that came through in Genesis three. There's a blessing and it's going to happen through an offspring again. Abraham's descendants is that little connection with the proto gospel, the offspring. It's going to be a blessing for all the nations of the earth. And that's a promise that God makes to Abraham. And that promise is kind of fleshed out, expanded on in a couple of covenants in for Abraham later in chapters 15 and 17 where God establishes this relationship between Abraham and his people and the mutual obligations on both sides God's commitment to these promises and drawing from Abraham a commitment to faith and trust and obedience to God so it's foundational kind of covenant stuff here.

But then the promise of many descendants starts to be fulfilled as Isaac is born and Jacob and then he has the many children with his four wives, 12 children or 12 sons and a daughter at least. that leads to conflict. There's conflict within their sons and Joseph is sold off into slavery to Egypt. And that's kind of where the story ends. At the end of Genesis, you've got Joseph, he passes away, he dies, but their family is there in Egypt safe from the famine and kind of multiplying.

So what are the themes from Genesis? What are we gonna benefit from if we read it? I think I'll just mention three. I think first one is we get as we read Genesis a really good grasp of creation, the big picture stuff that there is a God, there is a universe is made good, but it has fallen. We get these just this big fundamental worldview picture. You read Genesis, you're gonna pick that up. Secondly, we're gonna really come to know God as a promise maker and a promise keeper and a covenant maker and a covenant keeper. So God is relational, it commits to people, he speaks, he makes these promises. As you read Genesis you can't help keep reading and understanding that God, who he is, he's a promise keeper. And that's very spiritually helpful for us as Christians to have a clear grasp of God as someone who makes promises and keeps them. And then thirdly, think, particularly from the Joseph story, you see that this theme of God blessing many people through the one, blessing of the many through the one, because that's what happens with Joseph. Joseph saves many people. This is how the book ends pretty much actually in Genesis 50 when Joseph's brothers come and talk to him but he says to them about the whole selling into slavery thing he says in Genesis 50 verse 20, you intended to harm me but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done the saving of many lives.

There you see that great theme. God is in control. He sent someone special, an individual to save many lives. And of course, that's a theme we're gonna see throughout the Bible, but especially in Jesus and his death and resurrection for us, the saving of many lives. So there you go, very briefly, that's Genesis. It's pretty good read. Most people find it quite engaging, but as you read it, there's lots of good things to pick up on. This sense of creation, the big picture stuff, meeting God is a promise, a covenant maker and seeing God bless many through the one. So enjoy reading it and I look forward to the next podcast in this little series.

Small Group Toolbox - Ep 6 Communication

Hey, welcome to another episode of the Small Group Toolbox. And we're in a short series concluding this series today on the first four weeks to think about a growth group, things to think about for the first four weeks. And so far we've covered setting group goals, early aspects of relationship building, how to think about venue. And today we're going to think about communication. So how is your group going to communicate with each other? What sort of app platform, whatever are you going to use and how's that going to work? And I think this could be thought of as just like, oh, like a meaningless admin-y kind of thing, but I don't think it is. I think this, how you communicate is actually an expression of Christian speech. I think we want the way we communicate, not just within group, but during the week without various platforms is something we want to do as Christians in a Christian way.

So when you look in the Bible to think about speech, loads of places, but a great little go-to spot for Christian speech is Ephesians 4, 29 to 32. Let's read that now and make a few comments. So Ephesians 4, 29 says, do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ, God forgave you.

All right, I'll make a few comments on that, just particularly with reference to group communication during the week. So there's a couple of negative things there, things that we are not, this is a negative, or we're not supposed to do. So no unwholesome talk. No bitterness, rage and anger, brawling slander, which I think comes out particularly in speech is the point here in these verses. These are the negative things, the things that we're not supposed to do. And I think sometimes in our communications online, text messages, we can end up saying negative things, things that are not helpful, not beneficial on the platforms, whatever it might be. yeah, our Christian speech during the week, yeah, let's not say those negative kind of messages that can be unwholesome, that's not good.

Then there's some positive things though here. So positive, say things that are what is helpful for building others up according to their needs that may benefit those who listen. Now, obviously loads there for speech, but I think with messages and posts and texts and things, yeah, we can think about the same sort of principle. Am I posting this thing for my needs or is it for the needs of others?

Yeah, those sort of so in harmony that it's not a drama. But yeah, what can I say and what can I do in our messaging, our communication that will build others up, be beneficial for them? And then another positive is the theme of forgiveness here. It's worth mentioning verse 32, be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ, God forgave you. As there will be times in growth group communication when we might need to forgive each other or forbear with each other. Remember someone saying they felt negative towards the group because nobody had sort of liked or commented on their post or prayer request, whatever it was.

Now, there are going to be various reasons for that. you know, people are busy, they they overwhelmed their amusing things, whatever it might be just for a while. But it does feel a hurtful if you don't get the sort of comments and likes and things from what you've posted. But that's a time for forgiveness for giving people if the group communication hasn't been great for you in that particular time.

So let's be forgiving for each other as to how we work out with group communication. But of course, there's negative and the positive there. Behind all of this is spiritual basis, verse 32, do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Behind all this, we are spiritual beings. We have the Holy Spirit of God. That shapes who we are, our relationship with God, our relationship with each other. We don't want to be doing things with our speech that grieve the Holy Spirit and doing things that please the Holy Spirit. So I think all that kind of applies to group communication. So thinking practically now, you're in the first four weeks of growth group, you ought to be having a conversation, maybe you've had it already about how are gonna communicate as a group?

What and there's I think probably a what and a how question there. So what platform are we going to use? Is it WhatsApp or Messenger or big group text or some other platform? I don't know. You got to think what's appropriate for your group members. That could be anything from some kind of Snapchat thing or calling people up on the telephone, if that's your age group.

But so what is the communication thing? Ideally get by and to that so that everyone agrees. Sometimes you'll have a person in your group who doesn't have messenger or doesn't have WhatsApp or the particular platform. And as a leader, you want to say, well, don't just assume it's a straightforward thing for them to pick that up. They might have made deliberate choices not to have that sort of platform because for spiritual reasons, they find it unhelpful addictions, that sort of thing. But maybe they just need a bit of help technically setting it up. You can say, look, you can do this and you can block this and it'll work fine. Would that be all right? Or maybe it's just not going to happen. And you need to think about some other alternatives for communication. We as a leader, may even need to just explain, they may not get everything, but you'll try and communicate with them as you can. So work out the what, get everyone into sharing numbers, make it look good, have some images, pictures, give it some energy and creativity. And then how you want to talk a little bit about how we're use this communication platform. And there'll be different principles. I principles definitely coming out of what we saw in Ephesians there. So yeah, this is for positive things, this is for encouragement. We want this to be a great sort of place for people to post the things that are important, prayer points, praise points, thanksgivings, social events, that kind of stuff.

Also a little bit on logistics, it'll go there but you kind of want volume in your group chat. I think if there's too much logistics, it becomes just like a formal channel and people don't feel confident to put things on there. But if there's lots of stuff happening, fun things, prayer points, that will help. So how are we gonna use it? Yeah, positive things, post lots of things and try and be generous towards others as they post things. Comment, like, love the things that come up. It doesn't take long.

But remember, yeah, if people don't particularly comment on your post or something like that, be forgiving. It doesn't mean that they're upset with you or anything. It's this is just how these kind of things work. yeah, lots of forgiveness there as well. So yeah, and then as a leader, of course, you're going to set an example. As you post some fun things, things are excited about church. Yeah, it try not to let it all be just group announcements of who's on supper and what our roster duties are. Bring a bit of that community into your communication. So yeah, I think if you do that, you'll be up for a good start there. That kind of concludes our series on the first four weeks. And next time we'll be looking into lots of other things about small group leading. If you've got ideas, things you'd like me to talk about, please let me know. Thanks guys.

Small Group Toolbox - Ep 5 Venue

Welcome to the Small Group Toolbox. We're in a series about the first four weeks of Growth Group. And in previous weeks, we have looked at setting group goals and expectations, how to do that, how to discuss those group goals, and also how to build some relationships in the first four weeks, just that early kind of stuff. This week, we're gonna look at venue. Now, venue's an interesting kind of topic. You think, really, is that relevant? Surely it's just about us and the Bible, what does it matter if we're meeting in a tent, shed, an aircraft hangout, whatever? Why does that matter? Well, I think it does matter. We are created beings. We're not just minds. We are people with bodies, with the five senses. We feel things. We are aware of our environment. And I think there's nothing particularly holy or about ignoring the realities of us as created beings with bodies. And in fact, potentially, if we ignore it, we're missing out on ways to make the most of our time in growth group, learning from the Bible, learning about Jesus, connecting with each other, praying and so on. So yeah, what do we think about venue? I love just to look at a few things in the Bible before we get into the practical things.

And the Bible of course doesn't tell you exactly this is how you should have a venue set up for growth group. But there's a lot of stories and occasions and episodes of people engaging with each other in God's word in homes. So an example is Acts chapter 10 about Cornelius when he welcomes in Peter and a few of his friends to his home to well, hear the word of God, kind of do a Bible study in a lot of ways.

So, Acts 10 says in verse 23, The next day Peter started out with them and some of the believers from Joppa went along. The following day he arrived in Caesarea. Cornelius was expecting them and had called together his relatives and close friends. As Peter entered the house, Cornelius met him and fell at his feet in reverence. But Peter made him get up, stand up, he said, I'm only a man myself. While talking with him, Peter went inside and found a large gathering of people.

So there you see Cornelius hosting a Bible study in some way. He welcomed Peter and he'd managed to gather a large gathering of his relatives, which is great, pretty normal. Ancient world, have a lot of relatives around, and also his close friends, people near to him, those necessary, the Greek word is a bit like necessary, and friends, people he loves. And he'd obviously put thought, he must have put thought into how this was gonna happen, what kind of space that we're gonna use, what was gonna facilitate meeting Peter and hearing God's word. So I think it's very normal in the Bible, you could do further studies on what it's like to have people in your home. But yeah, so how do we do it? How do we think about venue well, that will be a real strength for your group. So I think different ways to think about it. You could, one simple way is to imagine the experience of someone coming to your group, starting with really their experience on the street, driving or walking or however they get to the venue. Think about that experience. there enough light? Are the paths clean? Can people maneuver through any obstacles that are out there? Is your letterbox, if you're hosting at home, clearly displayed with its number? Is there parking? Do you have parking recommendations?

Think about what's gonna be make it easier for them to arrive and enter into the house from the street. For me, I allotted leaves at our place. And I think sometimes about this about sweeping the front porch or getting rid of the cobwebs, making our place look less like a haunted house and more like a place you'd actually wanna be. So think about things from the street and then think about that first entry into the door. Like are you gonna leave the door open? Do you have a doorbell? Is the doorbell working? Is the doorway lit up?

As people step through, have you given them permission just to open the door and come in? What are they supposed to do with their shoes? Is there a space for their shoes if they're taking them off? If they're isn’t, is it clear that they can wear them inside? Is there a mat to help them out with that? Just you're thinking getting in the mind of the person visiting so that they're not worrying about etiquette and what they're supposed to do and where that which entrance they're supposed to go into. They're able to relax and look forward to meeting new people, engaging in anything else that might be on their mind going in. So think about the street, the doorway, and then the room. Like how are you going to set up the room for growth group? There are different ways to do this. Sometimes your options are limited. Sometimes you've got more choice. One big question is whether you're gathering around desks with chairs or on sofas. Now, for some people, you don't have a choice. It's going to be sofas. That's fine.

Other people might be in a space where maybe, well, a desk and a chair, is probably the option you've got, or maybe you've got some freedom. In general, having things on sofas feels a bit more relaxed, more relational, there's more kind of a social atmosphere. Sitting at a desk, a table or bench with chairs is a bit more intense, forward-focused study, thinking, learning, kind of growing. So there's sort of strengths to both. What it means is if, say, if you've got a sofa set up, you might have to work a little harder to get people engaged in actually learning and studying and reading the Bible. There's also a risk that they might fall asleep more easily on a sofa. I gave some advice to one growth trip leader about a group member who regularly fell asleep and I said just put him on a less comfortable chair and yeah, that helped keep him stay awake. Not necessarily the same advice in every situation, but yeah, that makes a difference. To help people to engage a bit more and make sure they do have places to put a Bible or a pen, put out the signals that we are serious about learning the Bible here.

And if you're in a desk table kind of setup, think about ways that you can make that feel less like a work meeting. Maybe a little bit of table or desk decoration, like a tablecloth or some thing of flowers or a cactus or something. Model to the person, model a bit sort of leaning back in the chair, looking a little bit more relaxed in that space. And you can still have the benefits of a desk table set up, but not as like intense and cold that you might have at a work kind of meeting. So think about your desks, chairs, lounges, try to make those spaces comfortable. The cushions that you need so people aren't getting a sore back. Bean bags aren't usually a good idea. I mean, sometimes it's necessary, but often I find that the person on the bean bag contributes less, they go quiet. So try to get people up on a similar kind of level.

Yeah, manage the space so people aren't so far apart that they're kind of calling out to each other, but not so close together that they are feeling constricted and people can't manoeuvre around or they're feeling trapped. So maybe we'll talk more about venue and space in another episode, there's a lot to think about there. But if you're thinking a bit at least in the first four weeks, that's going to really help. So we've talked about the street, entering the door, the room.

Another thing to think about is lighting. Again, it's a bit of finding a good medium there and sometimes your options are limited. But if it's too bright, it can feel just a bit intense and unpleasant. If it's too dark, people will have trouble reading their Bibles and they might sort of fall asleep again. Think about how you can set up floor lamps, overhead lighting, natural lighting if you’re meeting during the day, a way that people can see their Bibles, especially important if you've got older people in your group, without it feeling like you're under the lights of an operation. So, think about lighting. You can think about music and sounds. So, what are people hearing as they come through? Are there ways you can isolate sort of distracting sounds from the garden or the kids' rooms or other things?

And do you want to play a little bit of music as people coming in there to set a warm kind of atmosphere the same way a cafe might do that or if you ever go to our mission events, life, connect series, other things, there will usually be some gentle music they're playing to set a warm atmosphere. I did this for a bit with a men's group and then after a while I realised they didn't want any music, they found it distracting and so I gave up.

But if you have the opportunity, you might think about how to set a good bit of atmosphere with some music. So there we are, we're talking about street, the room, lighting, music. Another thing then is food and drink. How are you going to do that? Again, we can talk about this more later, but think about the flow. How are people going to get their food and drink, tea, coffee, how?

Where are they going to move from there? Do you want to help them? Self-service? How can relationships be facilitated during that flow? Moving through people's kitchens is very normal in Australian culture. It might not be so for other cultures. It might feel a bit intrusive to enter into someone's kitchen, but you can help reassure people there, assuming that's what you want to do, and coach and train people on how to use your kitchen and make sure that you've got the things they need. If they need decaf, tea or peppermints or instant coffee or whatever it might be, yeah, make sure that you've got something there so that they can enjoy a drink and relax in people's company there. Same with food, are they setting it out themselves? Where are we gonna put that? How do we hit a level that's not too formal and overwhelming, but not too casual? What's the kind of right kind of food for your group? And I think that would pretty much cover most of the things on venue. one last thing.

If you do have kids or babies in your group, think about, do you want to have a little mat or a rug for them to lie on or snack on, make their crumbs on a rug like that? Yeah, you just obviously have to think a little bit more about how things are going to work there with kids and whether you're managing strollers, prams, breastfeeding during the group, that sort of stuff. But if that's you, I'm sure you'll know what you're doing there. So there we are, some basics on venue.

It seems like “Oh a truly holy group won't worry about venue” but the reality is that we are created people with bodies, with senses. And so these kinds of things matter. If we pay attention here, we want people to want to be at your group. And we want people to, I mean, really think less about the venue and more about what they're there for, about the people around them and the Bible and praying and engaging with God. So do a good job with venue and those things will come to the forefront.

See you next time.

Exit Interviews

Rationale.

Our church is a family; God’s family. We are united by our faith in Christ, ruled by his word and express this in loving service of each other. Its an astonishing God - given blessing to be part of a church. We want to believe this, live this and communicate this to each other.

This affects how we treat people when they leave us. God calls on us to be united in love for one another. We want to call on people to bear with each other, and forgive those that they have a grievance against. Our desire is that they will choose to stay and keep living for Jesus with us.

However, the sad reality is that people will choose to leave us. Sometimes, this is because they are moving away for work or family reasons. Other times, they are expressing dissatisfaction with our church (leaders) or with individuals within the church.

We still want to care for them after they have left us. Often this is simply exhorting them to push on with Jesus by joining a new church. We also want to see what lessons we can learn from their departure.

Process.

We need to know who we expect to be part of our church. We must a clear idea of what membership involves; that people are committed to living for Jesus in unity with his people, that they are committed to doing this with our church, and they are committed to respecting and submitting to the leadership of church. We also need to have a clear idea of who has chosen to join us and do this with us. We know who we are pastoring and our goals for them.

Usually, people don’t decide to leave us overnight. They have previously expressed a desire to move away. Or it been a long gradual process of withdrawing from church community.

There are usually three signs of the later. They’ve stepped back from being involved in a ministry team. They have been sporadic in their attendance at small group. They will often be more irregular at church, but this can be harder to spot in the Sunday crowd. However, this is usually revealed their kids declining attendance, which we must track for child safety reasons.

This means our small group leaders are often the first to recognise or hear that someone is leaving us. They notice the decline in attendance. Or the person outlines their personal plans as part of group discussions.

We want these leaders to be the first to pastor their members; to discuss these reasons with the person, pray with them, and if necessary challenge them. They will also need to inform staff of what is happening. This gives the staff the opportunity to have a follow up conversation, especially where its complex or emotionally charged.

Method.

Our aim is to encourage these people to continue with Christ. These conversations may follow the following pattern.

1. What is happening? ‘I haven’t seen you at church recently. Is everything ok?’

2. Gently ask why they are leaving. Keep asking questions to clarify. Remember that if sin is involved, people are often unwilling to be completely honest or forthcoming. So seek permission to ask them personal questions. As part of this, ask:

• how can they see they have grown in Christ at our church?

• explore what they feel church could have done differently.

• what would they like to pass onto the church leaders?

• how they think this move will help them kick on as Christians?

• what church are they planning to join?

• how can we support them as they make this move?

3. Assess these reasons. We need to recognise that we will make mistakes as a church. At the same time, a person’s anger or dissatisfaction with us doesn’t automatically mean that we need to change or could or should have things differently.

(a) if we are seeking to send them on to serve Jesus’ kingdom, then ask how we can continue to support them

(b) if we feel they aren’t leaving for good reasons (we are losing them), then we want to gently encourage them to stay and confront these underlying issues. In these cases, we need to recognise that these conversations will be awkward or challenging. For example, they might be leaving in order to

• avoid repenting of sin

• avoid dealing with difficult or bad relationships

• avoid hearing unwelcome teaching

• stop being a Christian

4. Pray with them.

Small Group Toolbox - Ep 4 Building Relationships in the First 4 Weeks

This is the Small Group Toolbox, a podcast I'm producing to help group leaders and growth group team leaders lead groups and lead healthy group leader teams. And we're in the middle of a series called The First Four Weeks, because I think with growth groups, it's not enough just to think about the first week, there's too much to do, better to think about the first four weeks. How is our group going to go through that storming and norming kind of stages. And that's going to take more than one week, take four weeks. Last week we did thinking about group goals, how to talk about group goals. And this week we're going to talk about relationship building, relationship building. Because I think that's what people are really interested in when they join a group. Most people, that's a big motivator for them. Even if they say it's sort of growing as a Christian, it's pretty common. There's a serious one about, I want relationships in my Christian life to help me. want to make friends. I want to do this together. It's a good, healthy thing that we want to encourage. So how do you build relationships in the first four weeks? I think it's important to know that you're not going to accomplish a year's worth of relationship building in just four weeks. What you can do is appropriate to that time, appropriate to the life of the group, but there are important things that you can do. And if you do this well, then the group's gonna go much better during the year.

You'll hit those group goals, you'll do some growing, you'll form great friendships, relationships. but why, first of all, from the Bible, why is this important? It's kind of obvious, but let's not take it for granted. The Bible values relationships because within relationships, love and encouragement happens. So I'll read Hebrews 13, verse one and two, great couple of verses. The author there says, keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters. Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing, some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it. Now, just really simple stuff there. Just keep on loving one another's brothers and sisters. We are brothers and sisters in this Christian family, and therefore we love each other. And there's an encouragement to keep on loving, as if it's not always easy, but the encouragement is to keep on loving one another.

 And love of course happens within relationships. We know the people we're loving. And then secondly verse two, it's about showing hospitality to strangers. I think that's a good verse because sometimes in growth group, you'd come together and the people you're meeting with are initially strangers to you. part of like Christian maturity is to show welcome to those people you don't know, to be caring for them, interested in their lives, welcome them into your lives. So show hospitality to strangers. Will they be angels without you knowing it? I think that's a reference to some stories that counts in Genesis. I don't know if that'll happen in your group. Hasn't yet happened in mine. But I think the idea is there. I think the spirit of that verse is that show hospitality to strangers. And what you might find is these strangers become a great blessing to you, like bringing an angel into your life. So go into these kind of relationships with great optimism as to what might happen. So let's build relationships, that's for sure. So let me give you four simple things that you can do to help build relationships in your first four weeks. The first thing is just the basics of like introducing people to each other, learning names and helping them just know the basics of each other. You don't assume things. Sometimes we can think, well, I know that person, I know that person, obviously they must know each other. No, that's not the case.

 Take the time to say just the little things. Have you guys met? Do you know each other? Have you come across each other yet? Here, this is so and so, this is so and so. Let's just welcome each other. On that sort of basic stuff, you could even do things like have name tags. If you've got a group that's a little larger, 10 or more people, have some name tags for the first few weeks, or something fun, a little sign, or you've got a group list there that people can refer to. People will be a bit more relaxed if the names come a bit more easily. So that's the first thing, just the basics of introducing people and learning names. Then the second thing is like what we might call getting to know you games, something a little fun that's going to take place for the first, not just for the first week, the first four weeks, I reckon, something fun that'll help people get to know each other.

 This is kind of about avoiding the traditional things of like what's your job and what's your, or what you study. That's sort of, we'll get to that in time, but people can do that by themselves. We wanna be helping people see who the group members are as a whole, as a whole person. There's more to them than what they do or what they study. And let alone the fact that there'll be people in your group who don't do paid work or aren't studying and suddenly that becomes a bit awkward. So let's not talk about that. What's a fun thing? Now, if you're a creative sort of person, you'll have lots of ideas on this, ways to get to know each other. I'll just tell you that the default easy one that I use, I would just go around and remind people of names and just choose an interesting topic for them to share about. So I might say, tell us about your first pet or tell us about the last song that you listened to on your streaming service or tell us about the first car that you owned or your ideal Saturday. Look, just simple stuff. People are going to be fine with that. They'll go around, they'll tell a story, there'll be a bit of interaction and you've moved things along. People have started to get to know each other. If you want to do it bit more creatively, could like, my other thing is to bring a bowl of &Ms and people pull out a colour.

 And then I reveal, well, if you pull that yellow, you've got to tell this story about your most embarrassing moments. Or if you've got a blue one you've pulled out, you need to say what your top hobby is or something like that. And now, so that's, it's simple, it's easy, and that will just take a short amount of time. Do that every week for four weeks and your group will start to get to know each other. If you've got other fun ideas on how to get to know each other, then go for it. But that's my default kind of fun getting to know you kind of activity. And then I think so first one is like the basics gets to know each other, others names. Secondly, a of fun getting to know each other. Thirdly, I think in the first four weeks, even though you can push in just a little bit deeper to help people get to know each other. And for me, this is a question like, as we go around the group, what what do you how are you hoping to grow this year as a Christian? What's what's a prayer that you're bringing into this year?

 Now that's a little deeper than what was your first pet, but it's also not so open to a big share that it's suddenly intense. It's not appropriate for the first four weeks when we're getting to know each other, but it can just reveal a bit more. People might say, for a question like that, I just want to read more of the Bible this year, or I just want to be able to make church a priority this year for me. That's a growth theory for me. Or, I would like to invite someone to life or an evangelistic event this year. And these are pretty easy things to share, but they do reveal about each other. We do learn through these little things. So a question that just brings out something a little bit deeper and do that once or twice in those first four weeks will help your group get to know each other and build relationships. And then fourth point would be to do some planning for social events or a weekend away? Now, social events, if it's just an evening, or Saturday, that's people a bit more flexible there. But even that can be tricky weekends away, definitely take a lot of planning. If you've got a largest group, especially people will be all over the place. And so that will take a little while but you want to in the first four weeks, start that planning process. What is our social calendar look like? It'll look like for the first half of the year, can we find some time for a weekend away?

 How are we going to do, let's talk about why we do social events, but then you plan a few dates. What can we look forward to as a group along those lines? Now we'll talk more about weekends away and social events later, but I think if you kind of hit that in the first four weeks, you'll find that those will come along quicker, those social events, those weekends away, and that'll really facilitate relationships across the life of your group. So there we are, relationship building in the first four weeks. The basics: introduce each other, learn each other's names, have some fun sharing some stories, getting to know each other, then just go a little deeper question that reveals something more about people and then do get underway with some planning for the year. yeah, hope that's helpful for you as you start groups this year.

Small Group Toolbox - Ep 3 Setting Group Goals

Transcript:

Hey there and welcome to another episode of the Small Group Toolbox. Now this is a little podcast I'm running to help you be a better group leader or a better growth group team leader. Now, I'm wanting to do a short series on like the first four weeks of Small Group. I think this is more helpful than just thinking about the first week. The first four weeks are really when your group will come together. There's just too much to do in one week. It's better that you think, all right, in the first four weeks, what do we want to achieve there? What are the important things that we want to see in our group? Now, the first thing I want to talk about is like setting group goals. Group goals are really important. Your group has to have a purpose. What are we aiming at? What are we here for? And this is important even if your group is just continuing on from the previous year or it's been going for a while. There's a helpful phrase called vision drift that you would see in management books. Vision drift means just without really thinking about it, your purpose, what you're aiming for, your vision, can just kind of drift out of the way, drift off into the background. And you can be left just maintaining a structure or doing what you're doing, just tradition. And so we kind of want to avoid that. We don't want to avoid mission drift. So we want to recheck, talk about, reframe, remind ourselves of our goals. And so how do you do that? How do you set group goals? Well, I think firstly, let's just have in mind that we are, this is a biblical idea, the idea of things having a purpose, a reason, something going on in the Bible that's often framed as a prayer. Like what is our prayer? What would I be praying for as a group? And so like Philippians 1 verses 9 and 10 is a good example of what a prayer could be. So Philippians 1: 9-10 says, is my prayer that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ to the glory and praise of God. And you can see there just a few verses, but what you've got there is something that Paul desires for his people.

It's his prayer about abounding love, more knowledge, greater wisdom, doing what pleases God, thinking about the future of Jesus return, all that kind of thing. You can see how you could form some group goals out of a simple prayer like that. So yeah, things have purpose. We want to keep that perspective. So how do we do it?

Invite your group to share what are their goals? What would they like? So imagine you're sitting around in a group, ideally get a whiteboard up or some butcher's paper, something like that, and just say, well, what are we hoping for in this group? What would you love to see in this group? What kind of group would you like this to be? And there'll be a bit of a pause, but then people will start talking. And you just write up whatever they say. Someone will say, we wanna be a prayerful group, so you write up prayer. And we wanna study the Bible, they write up Bible. We wanna have deep relationships, write that up. Everything goes up on the board there. That's a very kind of collaborative experience. And then, so that's the first thing, share goals. Secondly, you just wanna reflect on those a little bit. You are the leader, remember? So you are leading this group. Ultimately, you're responsible for where this group goals goes. And so as you go through this process, you might say, I really love this and this and this. And I think this is going to be great for our group this year. This is what I want for our group as well. Now there may be a group goal that you're not sort of so persuaded on. Maybe somebody suggests, I would love this group to be where we go for a weekly run together. It's really important to me that we have a weekly run as a group.

And you might be able to say, exercise is good, activity is doing things together. We might kind of, maybe that's a bit of an optional thing. So you provide a little bit of feedback or review on a goal that maybe not is what you really want to focus on. So first, so we've got share goals. Secondly, kind of reflect and review those goals. Thirdly, I think it's good at this point to bring out what your church, what Hunter Bible Church thinks should be the goals of a group.

And that's the point where you would bring out the, what we call the growth group infographic and run through that. That kind of document, just one page, sort of encapsulates what groups are about and what we're hoping for for groups. Now that's gonna correspond very closely to what your group's come up with anyway, but there's a few little phrases there that are kind of coming from the church leadership coming, that's gonna be helpful for you and your group to hear together.

We'll do a bit more on that later. So bring out the HBC goals for the group and the growth group infographic, reflect on those, some helpful discussions, tangents perhaps. And then fourthly, it's time to just finish that conversation. So that's been great. It's so good to have these goals and then capture those goals, like take a photograph of the whiteboard or the butcher's paper or bring it, have it there ready to go next week or put that and put that photo in the group chat or whatever.

This is something you kind of can be accountable for in a terms time or six months time. You can look at those group goals and reflect like how are we going in those is did our group head towards those goals in the past two months, six months? How can we continue to reach those other goals? Can we add to them things like that? So record that's the fourth thing. So share goals firstly, secondly, reflect and review the goals that are suggested.

Thirdly, bring up the growth group infographic, think about the church's goals for groups, and then fourthly, conclude things and record what your group goals are. Now that's something you can do in week one, but if you don't get to it week one, you can do it in week two. You can revisit in week three and four. It's all part of that first four weeks shaping the group experience. So I hope that's helpful. Look forward to seeing you in the next episode.

Small Group Toolbox - Ep 2 Gathering Your Team

Transcript:

Hey there and welcome to another episode of the Small Group Toolbox. We're recording this in January. And so this is a time when we think about what is our team gonna look like when it comes to leading growth group for the year. And by team, I mean, like who's gonna help me with this? We're talking about my co-leader, my core members, and even the hosts of the growth group. That's what we're gonna be talking about today. Gathering your team, here we are.

As we kick off get started for the year, because all good ministry is done with other people. Ministry is a team thing. We do it with others. And that includes growth group ministry. There's a saying that goes, if you want to go fast, go alone. But if you want to go far, go with others. And that is certainly true in ministry. If you want to go the distance with growth group, you want to go with others. Now, who is that going to be? Well, before we get to that, I just want to show us a little bit of what Paul did, the apostle, with his ministry. And we think of Paul as a big name, but really when you look into it in the Bible, he is always working alongside others. And kind of the go-to chapter for this is Romans 16. In Romans 16, finishing the letter to the Romans, he just talks about a whole lot of people that he's done ministry with and he's in relationship with. So just to give you a bit of an example.

So Romans 16 verse three, Paul says to the Roman church, greet Priscilla and Aquila, my coworkers in Christ Jesus. They risk their lives for me. Not only I, but all the churches of the Gentiles are grateful to them. Or we could skip down to say verse six, where Paul says, greet Mary who worked very hard for you. And then verse eight, greet Ampliatus, my dear friend and the Lord, and greet Urbanus, our coworker in Christ and my dear friend Stachis.

So Paul was not a sole kind of ministry guy. He was in a teams. And so I guess the question for us as we go about our ministry in growth groups is who's gonna be on our team? Who's gonna help partner with us in this ministry? In other words, who's gonna be our Mary? Who's gonna be our Ampliatus? Who's gonna be our Priscilla and Aquila to help with the fruitful work of the Lord that we're doing. So.

That's what we're gonna talk about today. So let's start with co-leader. Now, hopefully you have a co-leader. We don't always have co-leaders in growth groups, but if you do, that's great. What are you gonna do there? Well, first of all, so I just identify, clarify who your co-leader is. Hopefully that's clear by now, but if not, clarify that with the team. Who's your co-leader? And then just kind of connect with them. Set up a time to sit down and ideally face to face and talk about growth group for the year. So you'll co-leader start there. Now, what do you do in this conversation as you meet? You sort of say, right, what's the years coming up? Well, it's important before you go into the details like the supper roster or the who's doing what, where it's important that you review the vision. Like, what are you wanting to get from this growth group? What do you want this growth group to be this year?

That's going to be partly just looking at the general vision of maturity and growth groups that you would have received during your training. It's on the infographic and various other teaching that you would have come across. That's the general vision, which you would know is like that we would be growing together to become more like Christ. Now you want to be clear on that and excited about that and see why that's what we do here with with small groups. But I think it's really helpful to kind of particularize it for your group. Like, how is that going to what is it to look like in your group?

Now, what's going to be a kind of vision or a language or an idea or way of thinking that fits with what we're on about here, but also like what's going to really be moving for you? Other people, other groups, people I've spoken to have done, had things like, this year we just want to really grow as Bible women. We're to be women who are keen on the Bible, love the Bible.

That's really what I'd want to see this year. So that was one leader talked about that. Someone else would be saying, well, this year, this is a year of getting serious about Bible and prayer in our lives. And that's going to be focus of our group. So we're going to, by the end of the year, we're going to be people who love the Bible, love prayer.

So that was a particular vision for another leader. Or another one would be like, we want to form a group and where our relationships are going to be deep and godly and really spurring on to each other, each other in Christ. So a little focus there on a deepening of relationships. Now all those things are good, but what's really great is for you and your co-leader to have a kind of shared enthusiasm and vision for what you want to see in the group for this coming year. So don't get caught up in the details too early. Start with the vision. What are we hoping for? What would be the dream group experience there that you're looking forward to? And then the next thing to talk about with your co-leader is like some expectations. Now,

that could happen in different levels, but a few key things to think about is like, how are going to work together? What's going to be the nature of our partnership? Is there a senior and junior partner? How are we going to work together? How are we going to meet and communicate? Are we going to have a weekly meeting, four-lightly meeting, a phone call once a week, a text message on the day? What's going to be a good level of communication? And then…

I think it's also good to share about what our strengths and weaknesses are. So what do we bring as co-leaders? So for example, I have a particular weakness in remembering people's birthdays. It just doesn't seem to register as a priority for me. I'm probably a little cold in that sense. It's not a strength. So if I can for me to co-leader who's going to be like, yeah, I love remembering people's birthdays and celebrating that, then that's great. Now, maybe there are more important things, strengths and weaknesses to share, but that's a good way to just be honest with your co-leader and stuff, to talk about those things. But yeah, how are you going to work together as partners in this? And then finally, I think we're a bit more into the details of what are we looking for in the in the group, talking about time? What time we're going to meet? When are we going to allow people arrive and start the study? What time are we going to finish?

Are we going to attach supper or a meal or what sort of frequency there, what kind of meal or supper or morning tea, whatever it might be, how are going to communicate as a group? we going to use WhatsApp, Messenger, Snapchat, whatever, how are we going to communicate? How are we going to do prayer in group time? Are we going to do triplets or all in or guys, girls, that sort of thing? What are we going to do about a weekend away? Should we try and book one in or just have a social day out on a certain time? These are the of the details that you've talked about in your group and as many details as you wanna go into, knowing of course that there's always unpredictable things in a small group leading.

I think you most of the way they're having talked things through with your co leader. And the final thing they might be due to do would be just to update your growth group team leader, let them know ⁓ how things are going, we're underway, seem to be connecting well. And, and there you are. So there is a good some just practical advice, I think on starting to gather your team and there with firstly, your core your co leader. Now, the next part of your team, your team is not just your co-leader, it's also your core members. Now, what is a core member? A core member is kind of someone who's in your group as a member, they're not formally a leader, but they're in your group as a member and they're core. They're just gonna bring strength and stability and positivity to your group. So a core member would be someone who you're just going to be excited to hear that they're in your group. You know, they're a friend basically, and they're there for you. They're on your side and they're going to be there every week. They're going to be there at church on Sunday. They are going to be positive about the group. They'll contribute. They'll just be a sort of person that you think, yeah, fantastic. So excited to have that person in my group. So finding a core member. They might be suggested to you or you might extend an invitation to them or you

You might talk with some of your team leaders about that. Who can I ask who's a good person? But identify a friend, someone who's going to be great for the group.

Meet with your identify your core member. You should reach out to them. Meet with them. Have phone call, whatever, and share expectations. People don't usually know what a core member means. So they'll say, yeah, I'll be a core member. But what does that mean? And that gives you a chance to say, well, I just want some to be really enthusiastic for the group and be on my side and helpful and contribute in different ways and and and talk through that.

Really, I think one of the most encouraging things that a call member can do is actually just come to church each week and group each week. When I meet with growth group leaders, that's often the thing they find most encouraging about a group member. Are they there every week? Are they there at church? And it's amazing how much encouragement that can be. gather your core members. think maybe one or two core members is about right. And then you'll be welcoming lots of regulars who will of course be encouraging hopefully as well. So core members, gather your core members. And the last person to think about as your team is gonna be your host. So the person hosting your group actually plays quite a large role in the health of the group. And we'll probably talk about that more in another podcast.

Assuming it's not you or your core member or your co-leader, your host will have an important role in the health of the group. So you want to be talking with them and saying, well, thanks for hosting. Here's what we're thinking. What are your expectations? What are my expectations? And things like setting up the room, making the space, minimizing distractions.

How is this going to work well? So a host, just by being a host, sort of sets an example for the other group members. So you probably want to have that sort of conversation with your host about what you'd really like to see from them. And also for you, they're making sacrifices by hosting as well. You're also thinking, how can we help you? Are we going to do the dishes, do some setup, some pack up, tidy up? How can we help you as a host?

So there are kind of whole heap of conversations that you can have starting out in a group that is about gathering your team. Remember, if you want to go fast, go alone, but if you want to go far, go together. So in this time, especially before groups start, yeah, use it to gather your team and do everything you can to help this to be a healthy group as you start. So that's it for this episode and I'll see you in the next one.

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Small Group Toolbox - Ep 1 Where's your heart at with small group this year?

Transcript:

Hey there and welcome to the small group toolbox podcast that I'm starting. This is the first episode and great to have you here. I'm hoping you're listening because you're interested in becoming a better small group leader or learning about small group leading. Today in this first episode, I want to just talk about having a positive attitude as we head into small group leading. After I'm recording this, it's summer, it's Christmas, we're at a bit of break. You can see the Nativity set behind me.

if you're watching on the video. And it's a time of thinking about what's coming up. Now for some of you, you might be really positive about this. Perhaps you're starting group leading for the first time and you're thinking, yeah, can't wait to get into it. Really pumped, really looking forward to small group leading. Other people, whether it's first time or not, you may be a little negative, like a little pessimistic, like, oh, now how's it gonna be? Is it gonna be difficult? Am I up for this? Can I do it? All those kind of questions.

and you might not be feeling so great about heading into it. And this is a really normal thing for small group leaders, a really common, so nothing to worry about having emotions, either positive or negative, going into small group leading. But things to do, I think, is to bring the gospel into your thinking and feelings about the ministry ahead, about small group leading. Bring some Bible truths to bear on wherever you're at. Now I've been going through this a little bit. I've been thinking about,

Okay, small groups coming up. There's a few uncertainties, bit of ambiguity. I'm not so sure about some people maybe not rejoining my group this year. So I've got a mixture of things. So what I've done is just spent a little bit time on a Bible verse that I love and I've been thinking a bit through in this last year and that is Philippians 1.18. And this is where Paul's talking about his ministry, what it's like in jail and what his hopes and thoughts are. But he says, talking about preaching the gospel, he says, one verse 18, but what does it matter? The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached and because of this, I rejoice.

Now, I just love that I find helpful things in there. What I see there is that Paul, he finds his joy in the proclamation of Christ. That's what it says. Christ is preaching because of this I rejoice. I find that challenging. Where's my joy? Where do I find joy? Not necessarily in the preaching of Christ. I think there's some change that needs to happen in me. But imagine that finding my joy in the preaching of Christ. What would that mean for small group leading? Well, that means that, no matter how small group goes this year,

If Christ is preached, then that's a reason for joy. And sure, I might not be the best small group leaders, I've got weaknesses, there's things I'm worried about, but Christ is preached.

I will find my joy there. And what does that mean? Well, that means I'm going to go in there. I'm to make sure that we talk about Jesus each week at Small Group. And I can do that. I can open the Bible. I can point to the sections that show us Jesus, the Old Testament, New Testament connections. The Bible states will help me with that. I can, you we can think and talk about Jesus every week in Small Group. That's something I can do. And that means that's great. Like I can rejoice in that. Like Paul does. He fills in with great joy to see that Christ is preached.

So that helps me think more positively and optimistically about going in a group this year. And I think that's something you can do as well. You could be from this verse or it could be another verse that is from your regular Bible reading. So as you do your regular Bible reading over the summer, you're looking for verses that will help encourage you and think biblically about small group leading. Or it just could be some favourite verses from your Christian life.

How do those verses encourage you, help you bring optimism and confidence going into small group bleeding? Could be about like, the sovereignty of God, that God is in control. Could be in the power of Jesus, could be in the Holy Spirit at work, could be in the community of God's people, the body of Christ. All those kind of things can help bring positivity and hope and optimism into your small group leading. And it's probably worth saying that if you are already optimistic, the Bible can again help you be grounded as you head into small group ministry. So, you you need to watch out perhaps maybe your confidence in small group leading is that you are going to be the best small group leader ever. You're going to not make any of the mistakes that your previous small group leaders have made. You're going to get it right all the time and things are going to be wonderful. Maybe you just need to sort of temper that a little bit from your reading of scripture, that the power of a healthy small group ministry is not in us, but is in Christ. And you can see here from the Philippians verse that I've looked at, that the power here, rejoice not that he's great at ministry, but that is Christ is preached. And so it can help you to remember that even if things don't go so well, or if you'll know that if Christ is preached, there'll be a healthy gospel small group ministry. So yeah, even if you're super positive, just is a good Bible stuff there to help shape and correct your approach to small group this year.

So I think these are good things to be thinking about. As I think about some conversation I've been having around church, a couple of people were not heaps, were a little nervous about what would happen with the small group, a little worried about conflict or neediness among group members. And what I said is, yeah, you've just got to go in really positive. You've got to think this is going to be a great year. It's going to be a best year ever for group leading and to have that confidence undergirded by some great cross-border truers.

So what is it for you? What are you thinking about there with a small group? What's your attitude? Positive, negative, a mix of everything? What Bible truths, what doctrine truths can you bring into your thinking and your feelings to help get off to a great start as you look forward to group leading this year? That's all I wanted to say for now, but yeah, hope that's helpful and I'll look forward to seeing you next podcast.

Christian Dating Part 1: How should we think about dating?

By Greg Lee

Christians live in a world where thinking differently can be a challenge. We want to please God, yet we often find ourselves making the same mistakes as everyone else. When it comes to dating, it’s easy to create a long list of rules and expectations. But the key is not rules—it’s principles. We need to start with what the Bible says.

Before diving into practical advice about dating, it is essential to consider how Christians should think about marriage and dating. Our thoughts shape our actions, and grounding our thinking in Scripture will help us navigate dating in a much better way. In this article, we will explore three crucial areas: 1. What God is like (especially in Christ) 2. What marriage is 3. How Christians should think about dating in light of God’s design. Part 2 of this series will look about putting these principles into practice.

1. What God Is Like (Especially in Christ)

Understanding God’s character is fundamental for healthy relationships. Three aspects of God’s nature—His sacrificial love, faithfulness, and purity—guide us towards a number of big principles.

a. God Is Sacrificially Loving

God’s love is not self-serving; it is sacrificial. Jesus modeled this perfectly:

“For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:45

“My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” John 15:12–13

Big Principle 1: Go out for their sake, not yours. Relationships are primarily about serving the other person. Instead of asking, “Will they be good for me?” ask, “Am I good for someone else?” The goal is not to find the right person but to become the right person. Church is not a dating service— we shouldn’t be using church to find a boyfriend or girlfriend. Church is about growing, and if that helps us become a more godly potential partner, that’s a good thing.

Big Principle 2: Be straightforward and honest, not ambiguous. Christians are called to serve, not boost our own ego. Be clear about your intentions. Never flirt to test someone’s feelings or for personal validation.

Big Principle 3: Serve even in breaking up. Most dating relationships do not end in marriage. A breakup is not failure—it is part of learning. But serve the other person by minimizing pain: don’t waste their time by prolonging it. Don’t be cowardly and manipulate the other person to be the one to do it.

It will help if you have avoided overpromising while dating and have avoided inappropriate intimacy.

b. God Is Faithful

God is faithful to His promises, as seen throughout Scripture:

“I have indeed seen the misery of my people in Egypt. I have heard them crying out because of their slave drivers, and I am concerned about their suffering. So I have come down to rescue them from the hand of the Egyptians and to bring them up out of that land into a good and spacious land, a land flowing with milk and honey—the home of the Canaanites, Hittites, Amorites, Perizzites, Hivites and Jebusites.” Exodus 3:7–9

The lifelong nature of marriage reflects God’s faithfulness.

Big Principle 4: Date in a way that reflects God’s faithfulness. When dating, we should mirror God’s faithfulness by keeping our commitments and dating only one person at a time. Casual dating has nothing in common with God’s faithfulness. It teaches us to treat relationships like a game where we avoid commitment and jump from relationship to another. All this increases the chance of people being hurt. Take it slowly, and treat relationships seriously as a preparation for potential lifelong marriage.

c. God Is Pure and Perfect

God calls His people to purity:

“But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: ‘Be holy, because I am holy.’” 1 Peter 1:15–16

“Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.” 1 Corinthians 6:18

“And now, dear lady, I am not writing you a new command but one we have had from the beginning. I ask that we love one another. And this is love: that we walk in obedience to his commands.” 2 John 1:5–6

Big Principle 5: Treat them as your brother or sister, not your spouse. Maintain absolute purity in relationships.

“Do not rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if he were your father. Treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity.” 1 Timothy 5:1–2

The danger is not singleness but sin. Avoid behaviors that compromise spiritual or sexual integrity. Couples tend to take breaking up off the table and instead try to figure out how to manage sin. Why not break up if sin is a problem? Do everything it takes to be pure.

2. What Marriage Is

Understanding marriage clarifies the purpose of dating. Marriage is designed by God as:

a. Between a man and a woman

“Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?’ ‘Haven’t you read,’ he replied, ‘that at the beginning the Creator “made them male and female,” and said, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh”? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.’” Matthew 19:3–6

Jesus points us back to Genesis 1 and 2. God created humanity in his image: male and female. Eve is created as Adam’s counterpart.

b. Between individuals who are not closely related

In Genesis 2 we see that a man is to leave his own family to marry (Gen 2:24). The principle is also in Leviticus:

“No one is to approach any close relative to have sexual relations. I am the LORD. Do not dishonor your father by having sexual relations with your mother… Do not have sexual relations with your sister, either your father’s daughter or your mother’s daughter, whether she was born in the same home or elsewhere…” Leviticus 18:6–16

c. Joined together by God

Marriage is not merely a human arrangement but a divine union.

“So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” Matthew 19:6

d. For life,

Divorce is a complex topic, but the clear expectation of marriage in the Bible is that it is for life.

e. Public

Marriage is a public thing so everyone knows the new relationship and family that now exists. We see that in Jacob’s marriage (not that this was all smooth sailing)

“So Laban brought together all the people of the place and gave a feast. 23 But when evening came, he took his daughter Leah and brought her to Jacob, and Jacob made love to her. 24 And Laban gave his servant Zilpah to his daughter as her attendant.” Genesis 29:22–24

For this reason it is wrong to just move in together and call it marriage. Eloping is also a bad idea.

d. Covenantal

In marriage you make promises and enter a covenant with another person.

“You ask, ‘Why?’ It is because the LORD is the witness between you and the wife of your youth. You have been unfaithful to her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.” Malachi 2:14

e. Reflecting God in the Trinity

God is relational in Trinity.

“Then God said, ‘Let us make mankind in our image, in our likeness…’ So God created mankind in his own image, male and female he created them.” Genesis 1:26–27

Marriage likewise is about unity and relationship.

f. Reflecting Christ and the Church

“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies.” Ephesians 5:22–28

The final marriage is really Christ and his church (Rev 19:9; 21:2, 2 Cor 11:2

Marriage should reflect Christ and the church. We ought to look for someone we can present to Christ as holy, and likewise someone who cares enough for you to present you holy to him.

Big Principle 6: Only date and marry a Christian.

“A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.” 1 Cor 7:39

Don’t go out with a non-Christian. In fact, don’t go out with an immature Christian. Don’t think that he (it’s usually a he) will change after you have started going out. The relationship always moves towards the youngest Christian’s habits.

Choose a person who is easy to follow and is to lead and present to Jesus.

Big Principle 7: Godliness matters more than physical attraction. Beauty and attraction is a gift from God so it is good to find the other person attractive, but don’t make beauty your number one priority. Inner beauty is more important and long-lasting. Attraction is flexible and elastic and there is a good chance your attraction will grow during marriage.

3. So What Is Dating?

The Bible does not explicitly describe “going out” as modern culture does. Historically, there was betrothal or engagement—a formal arrangement prior to marriage (see the example of Joseph and Mary in Matthew 1:18-25). Dating, as we know it, is largely cultural.

Dating is a period for two single people to get to know each other, discern whether marriage would be good idea, and grow in godliness, while maintaining the freedom to end the dating relationship if needed.

The Bible’s only two real categories are married / single. If you’re dating, really you’re still single. This is different to how we think. We tend to see dating as like “practice marriage”. So we spend loads of time together, doing marriage-type things and making each other fall in love. This is very unwise and can easily lead to sexual immorality.

Here is my definition of dating:

Dating is two single people who are not joined by God and do not yet reflect the Trinity because there is no lifelong commitment, being close friends, trying to figure out if they should marry, with the option of ending the dating relationship.

Big Principle 8: The goal of dating is to marry well or end well. Do not begin a relationship without considering marriage as a realistic goal. Dating is not for entertainment or emotional experimentation—it is about serving the other person, helping them grow and working out where this is heading.

You don’t need to be 100% ready to marry RIGHT NOW, but it needs to be a realistic option in the not too distant future.

Conclusion

Thinking about dating from a biblical perspective requires aligning our hearts and minds with God’s character and His design for marriage. By understanding God’s sacrificial love, faithfulness, and purity, and by recognizing the purpose and nature of marriage, Christians can approach dating wisely. Our goal is not simply to find love, but to reflect Christ in our relationships and prepare ourselves—and others—for the lifelong covenant of marriage.

Note: This article was adapted from a seminar with the help of AI

Photo by Cezar Sampaio on Unsplash

Christian Dating Part 2: How Christians should act in dating

by Greg Lee

Understanding how Christians should think about dating lays the foundation, but action is where wisdom meets practice. Applying biblical principles in real-life relationships is essential to honor God and protect both yourself and the person you are dating.

Dating can be understood in four phases: choosing, starting, going out, and being engaged. What follows comes from the principles in Part One of this series, and my own experience of pastoring over the past 25 years.

1. Choosing

The first step in dating is choosing wisely. Choosing the right person is not about chemistry or convenience—it is about godliness, character, and spiritual alignment.

• Look for a servant-hearted person. Observe how someone treats others, not just how they treat you. Service demonstrates love and humility.

• Look for a person committed to sexual purity. They should be committed to godliness. They are godly online, probably making use of accountability tools if necessary.

• Observe in community. The best way to know someone is to watch them interact in groups, not just in private dates where we are on our best behaviour.

A brief comment: Why not place couples in the same Growth Group? Because breakups happen, and we do not want relational issues to affect the larger church community. Being in different groups also helps with personal spiritual growth and developing accountability and support networks.

2. Starting

Once you have got a person in mind, the next step is starting the relationship with clarity.

• Be clear about intentions. Both parties should understand why they are entering the relationship.

• Initiate wisely. This will often be the responsibility of the guy. It’s good for him to take the risk. While it is not wrong for a woman to ask a man out, long term the pattern of the relationship should reflect biblical principles.

3. Going Out

Dating, or “going out,” is distinct from marriage and should reflect that reality.

a. Remember you are not married

Most going out relationships end in breakups rather than marriage. You don’t want to ruin a good friendship by your dating conduct. It can be helpful to think that you are dating someone else’s future spouse, so therefore act with respect, purity, and integrity.

b. Build the relationship slowly

The strongest foundation for marriage is friendship. Avoid romantic gestures or intimacy that promise more than the relationship can deliver. If we make someone fall desperately in love with us that makes the break up much harder.

c. Avoid exclusivity too soon

• Don’t spend all your spare time together.

• Avoid sitting together at church consistently. Serve the broader community.

• Be very careful about public displays of affection, that can be very discouraging to others at church who would like to be engaged but can’t.

d. Set boundaries around Bible study and prayer

Bible reading and prayer is good but it can lead to accidental powerful emotional and physical intimacy. Keep reading and prayer to public places and err on the formal side.

e. Treat each other like brothers and sisters

Absolute purity is essential. Set the boundary not at what you do but what leads to arousal. Avoid being alone in rooms or houses, prioritize walking, talking, and group activities, and be conscious of how non-Christians perceive the relationship. They will easily assume more than you think.

f. Know where you stand

Regularly assess your relationship’s direction:

• Why aren’t we married yet?

• What issues need resolution?

• What are our strategies and time frames?

If the relationship stagnates, make a decision to either get engaged or break up. Ambiguity leads to confusion, temptation, and unnecessary heartache.

4. Being Engaged

Engagement is a transitional period where dating evolves toward lifelong commitment.

• Engagement is good but can amplify sexual temptation. Marriage is a good strategy for sexual temptation (see 1 Cor 7:2) but engagement is a tempting time. You are more committed, more connected and therefore more tempted. Recommit to purity, the blessing of waiting, and take extra care.

• Keep the engagement period short. A smaller, shorter wedding is better than prolonging temptation and uncertainty.

• Practical considerations. Graduation, employment, or finances should not prevent marriage. Remember Matthew 6:25-34 and God’s provision.

• Use the wedding for Christ. Let the ceremony glorify Christ more than you. Don’t be caught up in worldly expectations, including how much money you spend. If you think your parents will want too big a say then take the financial hit to preserve your control. Make sure the gospel is preached at the wedding.

Finally, consider staying single for the Gospel if marriage is not immediately possible. Singleness is good, probably better, according to 1 Corinthians 7.

Conclusion

Acting on biblical principles in dating requires deliberate choices at every stage. From choosing the right person to navigating engagement, Christians are called to reflect God’s character—His sacrificial love, faithfulness, and purity—in their relationships.

Dating is not about personal gratification or experimentation. It is about preparation for marriage, serving others, growing in godliness, and honoring God. By following these guidelines, young adults can date wisely, love responsibly, and prepare for marriages that glorify Christ.

Note: This article was adapted from a seminar with the help of AI

Photo by Cezar Sampaio on Unsplash

Connecting with Muslims

Christmas and Easter are major landmarks on Christians’ calendars. If you can get someone to talk about what they think about Christmas and Easter and how to celebrate them you’ll probably find out what they think about God before they’ve finished talking. In the same way, asking our Muslim friends about their festivals is a great starting point for talking about what they believe, and potentially also about what we believe.

Muslims have two major festivals (“Eids” is pronounced /eeds/): Eid ul Fitr, last weekend, marked the end of Ramadan fasting, and Eid ul Adha, which is coming up in July. Eid ul Adha celebrates Abraham’s obedience, which he showed by his willingness to sacrifice his son. Muslims celebrate it by sacrificing an animal either in person or by proxy, by relatives in their home countries.

You may have caught Greg’s talk on James 2:14-26 Sunday at church online. If you did, you’d have learned that Abraham’s obedience was a key example of the fruit of genuine faith:

You see that his faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did. And the scripture was fulfilled that says, “Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness,” and he was called God’s friend. You see that a person is considered righteous by what they do and not by faith alone. (James 2:22-24)

The Muslims we’ve spoken with don’t see the animal sacrifices made at Eid ul Adha as symbolic reminders like the Lord’s Supper but to earn God’s favour for themselves or for dead relatives. They also look for God’s approval by giving one third of the meat from each sacrifice to the poor.

There’s a huge difference between Eid ul Adha and Abraham’s faith. James explains where God’s blessing of eternal life comes from:

Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers and sisters. Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created. (James 1:16-18)

What a great discussion to have with a Muslim you know! Here are some tips to guide your conversations:

1. Pray, ask questions, listen and take your time.

2. Don’t be afraid to show you know and love God’s Word, the Bible, by sharing a passage or story with them. Using a Bible app takes away any confusion about handling the Word appropriately and makes it easier to share it in languages other than English, if you need to.

3. We celebrate different festivals because we believe different things. If someone says that Christianity and Islam are the same, disagree politely. Talk about how we view Jesus’ identity and death and resurrection for our sins. Note that Muslims firmly believe that God asked Abraham to sacrifice Ishmael, not Isaac (read Genesis 22 for the full story).

4. Most Muslims are taught from a young age that the Bible is inaccurate because it has been changed. Try not to argue about this. See if they’re willing to read the Bible with you instead.

Ladies, here is a helpful Christian resource for reaching Muslim women.

Introducing Friends to Jesus With The Word One to One

What a privilege it is to have and be able to access God’s word! God’s word is powerful. (Hebrews 4:12) It is not only valuable for teaching, training and correcting us (2 TImothy 3:16), but also has power to save (2 Timothy 3:15).

The Word One to One is a great resource that makes it easy to read through the book of John with a friend. Each of the eleven booklets in the series takes you a step further into this vital book. Each page comes with questions and answers to help grow your understanding of what you read. Take a look!

We know the gospel demands a response. It may be worth keeping this in the back of your mind when reading with your friend. When you see them understand the gospel and claims Jesus makes, ask if they would like to respond to him. Ask if they would like to repent of their sin, trust that Jesus has taken the punishment for sin, and if they would like to make him Lord of their life. It is exciting to think that someone may come to know Jesus through studying John with you, isn’t it?

Here’s a demonstration of what the resource looks like and some tips on how to use it.

You can download all eleven booklets from the Word One to One website here.

Book Review: Radical

Radical is one of those books you might feel a bit nervous about picking up. The blurb states that author, David Platt “challenges you to consider with an open heart how we have manipulated the gospel to fit our cultural preferences. He shows what Jesus actually said about being his disciple—then invites you to believe and obey what you have heard”. My heart’s already beating a bit faster.

The main premise of this book is that Christians (and he is addressing American Christians in particular) have allowed the gospel to become influenced and even corrupted by the ideals of the great American dream — financial success and security, career and personal happiness. And much as I’d like to think it doesn’t apply to the Australian context, I have a sneaking suspicion that it does. Those goals and ideals — financial security, success and personal happiness and satisfaction — are very close to the Australian heart (and my heart) and therefore the church in Australia is liable to be influenced by them.

And so with a rising sense of discomfort, I begin to read. Initially, I’m a little wary — I’ve seen Christian books with titles like these in the past which have promised to unlock some special new way of relating to God by practising a secret formula that the author has discovered. Like a Christian version of The Secret. My fears on this account are unfounded. Platt spends a large part of his book preaching the gospel. Nothing new and no special revelation hitherto unknown. He spends a lot of time dwelling on our sin, God's consequent wrath, and therefore our desperate need for Jesus. In fact, it appears that by devoting several chapters to what the gospel actually is, he is trying to help us see how earth-changing the implications are. It is the magnitude of God's saving work in Jesus that should lead us to a radical faith in him, “This is why you and I cannot settle for anything less than a God-centred, Christ-exalted, self-denying gospel”.

My other fear, however — that I might be called upon to consider my comfortable life and how I might abandon this to Christ — is well-founded. And once again Platt points us to the Scriptures. For example, in Luke 9 Jesus reminds his would-be followers that they are signing up for a life of sacrifice and hardship, and that even returning to bury the dead or say goodbye to loved ones is not an option. Again and again, he shows his readers that Jesus' call to follow him is not an easy or comfortable one. In fact, it means death — death to self as we take up our cross. He summarises Jesus' call to his disciples this way:

“Ultimately, Jesus was calling them to abandon themselves. They were leaving certainty for uncertainty, safety for danger, self-preservation for self-denunciation. In a world that prizes promoting oneself, they were following a teacher who told them to crucify themselves.”

I think his point is well-made. As much as the gospel is good news, and we should rejoice in forgiveness and eternal life, following Jesus does involve sacrifice, abandonment of self, persecution and hatred. If we deny this, we deny the Lord who saved us.

Here is the danger of distorting the gospel as he puts it:

“We are giving in to the dangerous temptation to take the Jesus of the Bible and twist him into a version of Jesus we are more comfortable with.

“A nice, middle-class, American Jesus. A Jesus who doesn't mind materialism and who would never call us to give away everything we have. A Jesus who would not expect us to forsake our closest relationships so that he received all our affection. A Jesus who is fine with nominal devotion that does not infringe our comforts, because after all, he loves us just the way we are.”

Platt is also deeply passionate about obedience to the great commission. He argues that it is the role of every Christian, one way or another, to make disciples of all nations. Billions of people have never even heard of Jesus, so how can we in the west, which has had the gospel for millennia, ignore the fact that these people are going to hell? We must get involved in some way, both as individuals and churches and this goes hand-in-hand with giving to the poor. Platt deplores the way churches spend millions on their own buildings and resources and yet give comparatively little to the church in the developing world. This may feel a bit close to the bone as we are on the verge of purchasing a building, but I do think it's worth considering. We must not forget our brothers and sisters who face poverty and persecution daily.

In case you think the author is advocating some form of asceticism, he spends considerable time reminding us that although the call to follow Jesus is a hard one, the rewards are great — in this life and in the life to come. Treasure in heaven is what the rich man in Mark 10 has to look forward to if he will follow Jesus’ command. The parable of the hidden treasure also reminds us of this. As Platt says, Jesus is “someone worth losing everything for… For when we abandon the trinkets of this world and respond to the radical invitation of Jesus, we discover the infinite treasure of knowing and experiencing him.”

So what does Platt suggest we do? He focuses on a number of ways we can repent of distorting Jesus and what it means to follow him in a five-part, one year “radical experiment”. Admittedly this is starting to sound like a special formula, but I think they are good, helpful suggestions. Encouragingly, the first two things he exhorts us to do are to pray and spend time in God’s Word, because it is God who saves and God who changes us. He also suggests we give sacrificially to a specific purpose, one that we feel personally connected to. He advises spending some time — maybe 1-2 weeks — in another cultural context preaching the gospel. Finally, he says we really need to commit to being part of one church community and serving there wholeheartedly.

Radical is an uncomfortable read, but I think it is founded on the gospel and it is a rebuke we need to hear — certainly a rebuke I need to hear. So what will I do? I’ll give reading the Bible in a year another crack (so far the longest I’ve managed is about three months). I’ll try praying for other places in the world more — possibly from his suggestion of Mission World or a CMS prayer diary. I’m thinking of ways I can give more generously to something specific that I can be connected to — possibly a Compassion project. I’m still pondering other ways to be radical, so feel free to ask me or make some suggestions.

Book Review: Family Discipleship

Most Christian parents I know deeply desire that their children grow up knowing and trusting Jesus. I haven’t met any who would disagree that reading the Bible with their kids is a good idea, and yet I talk to many parents who feel like they are struggling in this area. Perhaps we don’t know where to start? Perhaps we’ve tried and it has frequently ended in tears, tantrums, curly questions, or a lack of engagement? Perhaps our lives and heads are so full of work, sport, hobbies and stuff that we’ve let discipling our children slip off the agenda?

Family Discipleship by Matt Chandler and Adam Griffin aims to help you create an achievable, sustainable plan for how to spiritually lead your family. It’s warm, encouraging and full of practical examples and ideas. It helpfully covers family leadership in four categories: Modeling, Time, Moments and Milestones.

Modelling

Modelling is pretty challenging on a personal level. Chandler and Griffin remind us that “for you to lead in the development of spiritual growth in your family, you must personally be spiritually growing yourself”. They point out that children learn from how they see us live in both the good and the ugly parts of our lives. And so, as we live out our walk with God, we need to be investing in spiritual disciplines like prayer and Bible reading, opening our homes and lives to others, seeking to share the gospel, and in particular, demonstrating repentance. They remind us: “Teach your kids that everyone desperately needs forgiveness, including you” as you allow them to join you in “experienc[ing] forgiveness and grace for your sin”.

Time

Time is the regular gathering of your family around the Bible, in prayer, in praise, and in serving God together. It’s the things you put in your schedule every day, week or month. Chandler and Griffin include going to church, and being invested in the church community in this intentionally planned time. They argue that this gospel time is something that must be moved to the top of the priority list, and they provide a long list of ideas of what it could look like. In our family, we added a Monday night all-in Bible time, called “Icecream and Jesus” (and, yes, we do get to eat ice cream too!).

Moments

Moments are all about being prepared to take advantage of “myriad opportunities throughout your everyday life that you can use to communicate the goodness of God and what it means to follow him”. Whilst these conversations may be small, simple and spontaneous, they require us to be relationally available and attentive to the opportunities. The chapter ends with a list of foundational truths, characteristics of God, attributes of godly character and Bible verses that can be applied to various everyday life situations. I’ve definitely started trying to leverage more everyday moments for a gospel conversation, but this is somewhere I could really grow, and I look forward to returning to this chapter for more ideas.

Milestones

Milestones are all about making occasions to celebrate spiritual milestones, and adding spiritual significance to regular celebrations. This concept didn’t immediately resonate with me, probably because my personal preference in celebrating is usually keeping things low-key. However, as I read the chapter I actually became convinced of how simple it is to give spiritual significance to things we are already celebrating. Things like giving a Bible verse in the cards we write, stopping together to thank God for the spiritual growth of each family member on their birthday, marking a baptism anniversary, or teaching your kids about marriage as you celebrate your wedding anniversary. The book has an extensive list of suggestions.

Just as an aside, perhaps you are like me and can be tempted to make children and family into the most important thing in your life, taking the place of God. Perhaps this idolatry is even harder to see in ourselves when what we are throwing our energy into is the spiritual growth of our family. It could be easy to read this book, especially in a season of lockdown, and only apply it in the context of your home and your nuclear family, but I don’t think this is at all the intention of the authors. Chandler and Griffin encourage parents to take the responsibility of raising kids who love Jesus seriously, but expect that we will do this alongside a spiritual family, the church. They remind us “Your first love is Jesus”, and to “remember you are making disciples whose gifts are to serve the Lord, not arranging a family to centre on your kids”.

One thing I really loved about this book is that it does not over-promise. Chandler and Griffin are clear that they are not suggesting that by doing these things you will ensure your children are saved. But instead, they push our eyes back to God and remind us that our children’s salvation “does not, therefore, depend on human desire or effort, but on God’s mercy” (Rom 9:16). It was encouragingly realistic and yet, positive. “No one is pretending the job ahead will be effortless, but do not assume it cannot be fun and life-giving too.”

Before I picked up this book, whilst we were regularly reading the Bible and praying with our kids, I think I was hoping that their growth would happen organically through being part of a Christian family. As I read, I wasn’t overcome with guilt about the things we weren’t doing, but I was encouraged and empowered to see and grab extra opportunities to invest in our kid’s spiritual growth. I would recommend this book to anyone who has biological or spiritual children, whether you are single or married. It will likely have the most practical application to those with children currently living in their households, but still be really helpful to expectant parents, those with adult children and even grandparents.

Garden Suburb Evacuation Plan

Tabled to the HBC Safe Ministry Committee: August 2025

Site Map

Evacuation Equipment 

The evacuation equipment for the Main Complex shall be stored behind the curtain on the North side of the Auditorium.

Alarm Response

When an emergency alarm sounds, the priority shall be to 

1. Evacuate all people to the Evacuation Point.

2. Conduct a sweep to check that no people are left inside, if safe to do so.

The following personnel will be responsible for the following activities.

Evacuation Roles and Responsibilities

Chief Warden: Responsible for whole site response

The Chief Warden shall:

1. Take charge of Main Complex site and announce to attendees:

   • “The fire alarm has sounded. We are going to evacuate through the nearest fire exit and meet at the Emergency Evacuation Point on the grass outside. Please do not leave the site - we need to keep the driveway clear for emergency services.

     (if there is a Kids Program running…) The kids team will be evacuating your children and they will meet you at the Emergency Evacuation point”

2. Identify/appoint Fire Warden 1 (for general site), and Fire Warden 2 (if there is a Kids Program running)

3. Ensure the Fire Wardens are aware of their responsibilities

4. Wear the white hat and vest and obtain the megaphone

5. Take lead at the Emergency Evacuation Point 

6. Communicate to attendees to remain on-site until emergency services arrive in order to keep the entrance to GS clear from traffic.

7. Communicate to parents “The kids team is conducting a roll call and we will let you know when you can collect your children”

8. Liaise with Fire Wardens once the site is cleared, and delegate to appropriate persons to conduct a search for any missing persons if it is safe to do so.

9. Communicate with Emergency services when they arrive.

10. Communicate with all people on site that they may return to site or leave, once Emergency Services have given an all-clear (or other reasonable instruction).

Fire Warden 1: Foyer + Auditorium

Core Responsibility: Oversee Evacuation and then do a site sweep of their area

Fire Warden 1 shall

1. Wear the fire warden vest and hat, stored in the Auditorium.

2. Determine the best Auditorium and Foyer exit points. 

3. Direct people to use those exits to move to the evacuation point directly and not collect children. e.g. “The kids team is taking your children to the Emergency Evacuation Point”

4. Conduct a sweep to check there are no persons in the Auditorium, Kitchen and Foyer bathrooms (if safe to do so). If there is no kids program and no Fire Warden 2, conduct a sweep of all rooms and spaces.  

5. Report back to the Chief Warden that the area has been cleared and await further instruction.

Fire Warden 2: Kids Areas (lounge, hall, playground, GS house)

Core Responsibility: Oversee Evacuation and then do a Site sweep of their Area.

Fire Warden 2 shall:

1. Wear the fire warden vest and hat, stored in the Hall

2. Oversee the evacuation of all the Kids areas 

3. Ensure all personnel have been evacuated from the Kids areas and Hall toilets

4. They shall notify all Kids Team leaders to 

1. Evacuate all children to the Emergency Evacuation Point

2. Bring rolls of children attending

3. Conduct a roll call at the Emergency Evacuation Point

4. Coordinate orderly collection of kids by parents

5. They shall liaise with the Team Leaders and report any missing children to the Chief Warden

Sunday Church

The Chief Warden shall be the Garden Suburb Campus Director, or (if not on site) the most senior member of staff, or their delegate.

Fire Warden 1 shall be the Service Area Leader (or their delegate).

Fire Warden 2 shall be the Kids Area Leader (or their delegate).

Women’s Growth Group

The Chief Warden shall be the Day Leader of Women’s Growth Group, or (if not on site) the most senior member of staff, or their delegate.

Fire Warden 1 shall be a Women’s Growth Group Leader appointed by the Chief Warden (or their delegate).

Fire Warden 2 shall be the Kids Team Leader (or their delegate).

Friday Youth

The Chief Warden shall be the Youth Pastor, or (if not on site) the most senior member of staff, or their delegate.

Fire Warden 1 shall be Senior Youth Section Leader (or their delegate).

Fire Warden 2 shall be the Junior Youth Section Leader (or their delegate).

Special Friday Youth Actions

Chief Warden shall:

1. Direct Youth Leaders to conduct a roll call using the Elvanto Check-In system

2. Direct a Staff member (or their delegate) to contact parents via Elvanto:

1. Go to Reports.

2. Select Check-in from the View drop down.

3. Select the Overall Check-In Attendance report.

4. Change the date range to just today's date.

5. Click Generate.

6. Click the mail button in the top right of the screen.

7. Select SMS Only.

8. Advise parents of the evacuation. Confirm all youth are accounted for. Communicate appropriate pick up time (default to regular end of youth time) after the arrival of emergency services in order to keep the GS entryway clear of traffic.
   Suggested SMS template:
   Hi parents — just letting you know the fire alarm has been triggered at the HBC Garden Suburb site. All youth have been safely evacuated and are accounted for. Emergency services are on their way, so we ask that you wait until after [TIME] to come for pickup to help keep the driveway clear.
   Thanks for your understanding and support!

General Events (Main Complex)

The Chief Warden shall be the most senior member of staff, or their delegate.

Fire Warden 1 shall be appointed by the Chief Warden.

Fire Warden 2 shall be appointed by the Chief Warden.

GS Office

If there is a Smoke Alarm or Emergency in the Site Office, the Chief Fire Warden shall be the most senior member of staff, or their delegate.

They shall have similar responsibilities as the Chief Fire Warden on the Main Site, applied as best suited to the GS Office.

Special Actions

Chief Warden shall:

1. Alert all personnel in the Building; Office, the Garden Cottage, Downstairs Classroom and Toilets

2. Conduct a sweep of these areas if safe to do so.

3. Contact emergency services and act as the liaison.

Songs from Sunday

We love to sing!

As a church we love singing together. We get to express what we know and love about God. Psalm 9:1-2 says, ‘I will give thanks to you, Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonderful deeds. I will be glad and rejoice in you; I will sing the praises of your name, O Most High.’

Check out the songs we sing together on Sundays in our Spotify playlist.

Baptism

We host baptism services 2-3 times a year at Hunter Bible Church. If you are thinking about being baptised or just have some questions, please connect with us so we can help you take the next steps.

In baptism, we celebrate the new
life given to you through Jesus’
death and resurrection.

Position Paper

Take a look at how we, Hunter Bible Church, view baptism

HAVE A READ

“For we were all baptized by one Spirit so as to form one body—whether Jews or Gentiles, slave or free—and we were all given the one Spirit to drink.”

— 1 Corinthians 12:13

Adults

If you’re Year 9 or above, fill in the form below to express your interest for baptism!

CLICK HERE

Infants

If your child is younger than Year 9, fill in the form below to express your interest for infant baptism!

CLICK HERE

Growth Group Infographic

See the Growth Group Infographic below.